Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Karma Drama

“Awalnya curhat, timbul simpati, rasa suka, n parahnya bs jatuh hati, mrntku cowo itu lbh mudah jatuh kasian sm cewe. Jd better dihindari curhat2 cowo n cewe yg sdh berpasangan, curhat ya ke pasangan msg2 ato temen sejenis aja deh.. Krn aku ga suka pasanganku curhat ke lawan jenis, so I won't do that either ;)”

Ini respon dari temenku, yang udah berbaik hati mau ngejawab pertanyaanku beberapa hari lalu, dengan cukup serius :) Yes, a couple days ago, I’ve asked a lot of my friends salah satu masalah klasik buat yang udah punya pasangan: curhat sama temen lawan jenis.

Maap ya baru diposting sekarang hehehe... Anyways, jawabannya ternyata sangat bervariasi. Bahasa jawaban aku modif dikit yaa! Coz I intend to keep my promise that the answers would be posted as anonymous :)

1
“Gue punya temen curhat lawan jenis tapi ngga sudi ah kalo pasangan gue punya! Apalagi kalo temennya itu single. Cuih!”

2
“Gue punya, pasangan gue punya. Ngga apa-apa asal gue kenal juga sama temen curhatnya itu”

3
“Mmm.. Ngga apa-apa kali ya, pasangan punya temen curhat lawan jenis. Terutama kalo itu temennya dari jaman rikiplik! Tapi aku harus tetep kenal dulu! Eh, tapi kalo temennya itu cantik, ngga boleh ah! Hihihi!”

4
“Ngga rela pasangan punya temen curhat lawan jenis, so gue juga ngga punya. Lagipula menurut gue, pertemanan cewe ma cowo sering berujung ke arah hubungan yang romantis. Ngga pure!”

5
“Suamiku punya temen curhat cewe??? Amit-amit deh! Bete aku! Marah! Sebel! Awas aja deh kalo sampe ketauan aku! Tampar!!” (Galak bener :D)

6
“Saya punya temen curhat yang udah punya pasangan, mba :) Berhubung saya juga perempuan, saya juga tau lah perasaan pacarnya gimana sama saya. Saya juga mikir kalo jadi dia gimana. Makanya, saya minta dikenalin & mencoba untuk akrab juga sama pacarnya.”

Oya, ada nih 1 jawaban temen cowokku yang bikin aku senyum simpul mencibir :p

“Istriku juga punya temen curhat di kantornya. Aku sih ngga apa-apa. Soalnya.... Si cowo itu lebay sih hihihi!”

Huuuuuuu!!! Coba kalo temen curhat istrinya itu bak Edward Cullen :p Mmmpf... Egois? Manusiawi? Manusia (baca: COWO) emang egois :p

Btw kenapa sih aku nanya-nanya soal beginian? I just wanted to know whether I’m sane or being stupid. Now, after talking to you all, am sure glad I’m not crazy after all :) And which answer represents “me”? I would say, jawaban yang paling atas & number 4.

But you see, once upon a time, I held on to a saying “good things happen to good people”. I tried my best not to do the things that might hurt the people I love, respect and care about, with a naive thought that “Oh, if I don’t do this, then he won’t do it to me either.” Or “If I do this, then she will do the same thing for me.” I tried to emphatize. I tried to put myself in his/her shoes. Before I take an action, I would think “Would I like it if somebody does this to me?” or “If somebody give this to me, will I be happy?” or “If he says these words to me, will I be sad?” In many ways, this kind of thinking has changed me. I was happy because I was changing to a better “me”. Yet again, with a naive thought that others would do the same thing and we can all live happily ever after.

Now here is where I’ve made a major mistake. I was convinced that by being good, I will get “good”. And everything will be just fine.

Blah!
If only it was that simple...

Now, after awhile and many experiences later, I realize there is no such thing. Never expect anything from anyone! If you want to change for a better "you", change for yourself & only you. Not for the person you love. No naive thoughts attached. If you want to do good, do it for yourself & don't expect to get the same thing in return. At the end, you could rely only to yourself. Not even to your loved ones. In fact, the people you love are the ones who could hurt you the most.

Sarcastic? No. I’m just being realistic.


12 comments:

Anonymous said...

SETUJUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!

Anonymous said...

waduh, gue sih selalu curhat ke sahabat gue yang kebetulan cowok. tapi alhamdulillah in the six years that we've been best friends, we have never once crossed the line, nor have the thought.

menurut gue sih semua kembali ke intensi, dan respect.

jujur, as a woman with more male friends than female, gue akhirnya mengkondisikan diri untuk terbiasa kehilangan teman saat mereka berpasangan... because most of their spouses think of me as a threat.

i guess that's life.

Anonymous said...

yeah be selfish for your self...

Anonymous said...

gua udah kebiasa utk gak rely on yg namanya bestfriends, in fact, i dont have one, temen deket ada tapi bestfriend ngga. buat gua bestfriend tingkatannya terlalu tinggi, beyond 'rasa2an' itu lah. sehari2 nyoba kelarin masalah sendiri aja. so far siy lancar2 aja. paling kalo ga tahan narik kuping2 freelancer yang udah dijamin kerahasiaanya.

Anonymous said...

kalo kata temen gue,
punya temen baru lawan jenis, di usia kita sekarang, dan jadi temen deket is bullshit!

Farika said...

phinandrio: hihihihi setuju yang mana nih :P

tika:
heheh i used to be just like you. right up until i got married. ngga ada paksaan sama skali dari suami. emang niatku begitu. tapiii mungkin sedikit mengalami "culture shock" :D jadi yaaa stelah 4 taun lebih nikah, agak keilangan jati diri :)))

astrimareta: mmm... selfish in a good way kali ya :D

adji: hahahahah
selain itu agak2 trauma juga ya ji :D
btw masih kangen niiiiiih huhuhuhuhuhuhu
kapan ngumpul lagiiii
kemang food fest juga rela deh :p

uwi: i think your friend just got my vote :D

Anonymous said...

ingle women are often put in the negative light in so many aspects i guess...
we have to endure the "kapan kawin?" question everywhere we go... our friends wives see us as seductive temptresses threatening their marriages...
sering kali kita mencoba untuk dekat dengan istri2 itu, tapi merekanya yang asem.... akhirnya suaminya deh yang ngumpet-ngumpet just to hang out with his friends... dan kalo ketauan, kita lagi yang kena.

hehehehehehe

Farika said...

tika: hahahahahaha bener banget!
padahal some (or many? :D) married women juga ngga kalah seductive-nya & bisa threaten other couple's marriage.
well...like you said. life :)

Anonymous said...

bener sih far.... apalagi kalo elo gak kenal ama temen curhatnya dudududuudud :P

Farika said...

alia: hahahahah yayayayaya

Anonymous said...

gue ga setuju pasangan kita, atau gue nya sendiri, curhat sama lawan jenis yg bukan pasangannya
buat apa ada pasangan ? heheheheh
kl ada masalah dianatar pasangan kita, ya selesaikan dengan pasangan kitabiar masalah ga melebar
awal dar i perselingkuhan dr curhat2 gitu
ya gak ?

Farika said...

anonim: you tell me :)