Take It Easy Being Forty-Three

Yeah… I’m officially 43 years old now. And my beloved Godsend made sure I remember that by saying again and again that I’m old :)) The first person who sent me a birthday wish was MamaHenny. She sent me a long prayer/message at 00:15 am. Then they, my beloved ones who were busy playing games, came to me and started to sing Happy Birthday in their own annoying ways :))

After midnight I started to get lots of messages. Friends and families from everywhere sent me birthday wishes via chat apps, Facebook, Instagram ea. I was very touched by one particular “present”. A message, telling me to read Al-Baqarah:286. It says:

“ALLAH does not impose upon any soul a duty but to the extent of its ability; for it is (the benefit of) what it has earned and upon it (the evil of) what it has wrought: Our Lord! Do not punish us if we forget or make a mistake. Our Lord! Do not lay on us any burden as Thou didn’t lay on those before us. Our Lord do not impose upon us that which we have not the strength to bear, and pardon us protection and have mercy on us, Thou are Our Patron, so help us against the unbelieving people.”

(“ALLAH tidak membebani seseorang melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya. Ia mendapat pahala (dari kebajikan) yang diusahakannya dan ia mendapat siksa (dari kejahatan) yang dikerjakannya. (Mereka berdoa): “Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau hukum kami jika kami lupa atau kami bersalah. Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau bebankan kepada kami beban yang berat sebagaimana Engkau bebankan kepada orang-orang sebelum kami. Ya Tuhan kami, janganlah Engkau pikulkan kepada kami apa yang tak sanggup kami memikulnya. Beri maaflah kami; ampunilah kami; dan rahmatilah kami. Engkaulah penolong kami, maka tolonglah kami terhadap kaum yang kafir.”)

Perfect :)

After that the day got even better. The 3 of us just chilled out at home, doing our own things, relaxing and waiting for the time to leave for my birthday dinner. Before we left I was very surprised by a beautiful birthday package from my beloved friend, Dinda. I immediately called her, thanked her and I cried :)) It wasn’t just because of the beautiful present, which I bet she totally thought about it thoroughly. I mean come on!!! A coffee mug and a diary??? That’s practically…ME! :)) In the advertising world we say it “very insightful” :p But I shed some tears because of the fact that she spent some time to even think about it and…made it happen! It was one of the sweetest things a friend has ever done for me.

Then it was time for birthday dinner. After doing some "research" we randomly chose a South American restaurant called El Asador. When we got there I was quite surprised by the ambience of the restaurant. I've read that it’s a family restaurant but I didn’t expect it to be that… Relaxing? The place is comfortable, the waitresses are very nice and most importantly: the food is delicious!!! I don’t know why but I’ve been craving for juicy steaks lately. That was also the reason why I wanted to try this restaurant. From the reviews I’ve read, they said that the steak in El Asador is very delicious. And yes it is! Kukka sticked to her choice: Spaghetti Bolognese -__- I ordered Bifes Con Cebolla: Grilled marinated steak, glazed caramelized onions, served with green salad and seasoned french fries. Hubster ordered Chivito Al Pan: Toasted soft bread, churrasco tenderloin steak, lettuce, tomato, beef ham, beef bacon, mozzarella cheese, fried egg, olives, and homemade mayonnaise, served with seasoned french fries. I must admit although my choice was delicious, but when I saw Hubster’s? I was jealous :))) Well… Since the dinner was a success, I’m pretty sure there will be a next time and that Chivito Al Pan is what I’m going to order! The second the waiter came and put down my plate, I immediately digged into that super juicy medium meat. I didn’t even take a picture of it! :)) It was so yummy my plate was super clean! I meant it! I probably only left some sauce stain on the plate but that was it. Ask Hubster! :)) Kukka also finished her spaghetti and the portion was big!!! For dessert I had Flan With Dulce De Leche. It was also delicious and it came with a Happy Birthday song :) Man my tummy was so full I didn’t even order the (birthday) wine that I’ve planned to have :p

So yes! My 43th birthday was lovely. I’m healthy. I spent it with the ones I treasured. I’m showered with love, prayers and thoughtful wishes from those who care about me. I have absolutely nothing to complain about. 

Alhamdulillah :)

43

I’ve died a thousand times and ways.

Until the day I choose to be reborn.

To be the fire. To be the flame.

I decide to rise brighter and live stronger.

Emerging from the darkness, the broken, the remains.

It’s all me, from me and for me.

Or just like Rumi said: 

“You’ve seen my descent. Now watch my rising.”

Eid Is Coming

It's the time when families and friends get together to ask and give each other forgiveness. It's the time when families and friends enjoying delicious food and naturally each other's company. It's the time when families and friends share funny stories and making new beautiful memories. It's the time to be grateful and happy. Together.

So be nice and stop saying or asking dumb and useless things such as:

1. Kapan nikah? (When are you gonna get married?/Still single?)

2. Jangan terlalu gemuk. (Wow you're fat!)

3. Kok kurus?!? (Why are you so skinny!?)

4. Kemana aja nih? (Where have you been?)

5. Belum isi nih? Keburu tua lho! (You're not pregnant yet? You'll be too old!)

6. Ngga mau nambah lagi? (Don't you want another child?)

And this list can go on and on and on until the end of the world. Feel free to post it on the comment section if you come up with another one. And these are ONLY the things that come out of the mouth. Imagine what's inside the heart??? 

"Wow he's ugly now... Good thing I didn't marry him." 

"Is she getting lips botox injection and facelift?"

"How can he afford that expensive car?"

"That Rolex watch... Is it real?"

"So she got divorced.. She must be cheating on her husband."

"Is he wearing the same baju koko from yesterday's iftar?"

"No hijab? She's definitely not praying hard enough. That's why no enlightenment for her."

Blablablablablablablabla... 

Now my question is: WHY??????????????? If you can't or don't know what to say to the person in front of you, just smile, be nice and MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS!!! Don't make small talks which can lead to anger or even worse, heartbreak and silent tears.

She might still be single because it's her choice and she's happy with it. He might be fat because of some illness he suffering and he's been working his butt off to lose it. She is skinny maybe because it's just the way she is. He might not come to 1001 bukbers (buka bersama) because he's been busy making a living until midnights. She might not be pregnant because she can't and she's trying very hard to accept it. She might not want to have another child because she and her husband only want one or cannot afford it. He might stay inside the house all the time because he's trying to be his own boss and making a home business. The point is you don't know what other people is dealing with and again, it's none of your business.

Lately I consider some gatherings like bukber or in this case Eid as events where people sadly judge each other's condition badly, openly or not, blood-related or not. I'm not a saint. That's obvious. I've made a lot of mistakes. Since I don't live in the jungle and obviously need other people, all I can do now is choosing the kind of gathering which I consider as meaningful and...harmless :)) Like enjoying a cup of coffee or two with friends who we can pour each other's heart out with. Or accepting a friend's invitation just to maintain a good relationship. One thing is definite: if you do want to spend Eid, enjoy the blissful day with the ones you love. So stay healthy, enjoy the rest of this fasting month and remember to finish all the must-dos. 

Because yeah... 

AfterLife

If you have Netflix, start watching AfterLife. I did. Twice. The whole season. Obviously not in one day but yeah... I've watched it twice and it still makes me laugh outloud, shed tears and smile. It's Ricky Gervais who is starring. He's also the one who wrote the thing. I know Ricky Gervais from Hubster. I think. And as far as I can remember he's always been funny. Now about this serial... AfterLife is about a man named Tony (Ricky Gervais) who loves his wife very very much. The sad thing is his wife died because she was very sick. Well just googled it by yourself to save me some time to type. Here's a little bit I copy-pasted: 

"Tony had a perfect life -- until his wife Lisa died. After that tragic event, the formerly nice guy changed. After contemplating taking his life, Tony decides he would rather live long enough to punish the world by saying and doing whatever he likes. He thinks of it as a superpower -- not caring about himself or anybody else -- but it ends up being trickier than he envisioned when his friends and family try to save the nice guy that they used to know." 

Anyways the second time I watched AfterLife I just realized more how...real this show is. The things being said and done... Not only by Tony, the character Gervais is playing, but also by the rest of them. There's this woman who comes to the graveyard everyday. She sits on bench right in front of her husband's grave, which (conveniently) is next to Tony's wife, Lisa, grave. She told Tony that she and her husband was married for 48 years and he never disagreed with her. Tony replied "I didn't get that long." ............. Then THIS: "I'd rather be nowhere with her than somewhere without her." HWAAAAA HIKKKKSSS! :((( There's also Sandy, a new journalist who works under Tony's supervision. Her line which is my favorite is "Just be happy.". You have to watch this part... It's how Sandy said it and the way she looked at Tony which makes this scene is so heartbreaking. 

Now... What makes AfterLife worthwatching is also because it's hilarious :))) So yeah... There's also so many quotes that makes my laugh so hard. For example when Tony is threatening a boy with a hammer because the boy keeps bullying his nephew! He also said to the boy "tubby little ginger cunt." :))) Tony's father who has dementia is also hilarious. Probably the best scene is when Tony said "I love you Dad." and the dad replied "Gay." :))))))

Ow well... I don't want to spoil too much. Just watch it!!! IT'S FUNNY!!!! And for starters I give you this:

Hello Turkey!

I can't really remember how it started and why... But "suddenly" we went on a holiday to Turkey with my inlaws, Ibu and Bapak, Dije, my brother in-law and his wife, Mba Dewi. For days I've practically stared at AirBnb website to find the perfect homes for us to stay and tourist sites to visit. And I must say it was quite a success :) But first we spent 1 night in Doha, Qatar at Mas Rama's house. Mas Rama is Hubster's second brother. He's a Qatar Airways' pilot and has been living in Doha with his family since...forever. Kukka was very happy there because she could spent some time with her cousins. Then finally, after a very long and tiring flight, on April 18th, 9:28pm local time - 01:28am Jakarta time, we arrived at the Ankara Esenboga Airport, Turkey. We were in awe. Not only because of how cool the airport was. But also because of the weather! MAN IT WAS COLD!!!! Not as cold as Finland but still... And the biggest problem was that we didn't pack our suitcases for cold weather!

On April 18 - 20th we stayed in a nice small hotel with a classic look named Gordion Hotel - Special Class. We stayed in Gordion for 2 nights. Anyways, I loved Ankara. It's a beautiful city. My favorite part while visiting Ankara must be the Anitkabir. It is majestic, beautiful and mysterious! I couldn't stop taking pictures. It's like there's no corner that is not worth admiring. Kukka and I also couldn't stop looking at the soldier...or guard (?) who was standing there. He practically looked more like a statue rather than a living human being :)) The guard just stood there. Body straight, didn't look like he was breathing at all and eyes wide open. I wonder... What if he wanted to sneeze? Or poop!!??!!? We were lucky because when we were there it was time for the guards to change...shift? Kukka recorded a cool video of the guards marching. It's a very interesting material to post for her vlog. Yeah... Kukka's teacher gave her an assignment. Kukka had to make a vlog about the places we visited during the trip and post the videos on her youtube channel. 

SEE!?! Don't you just want to like... Tickle him? 

Offer him a seat? Or just... Make him move juuuuust a bit? :)))

On April 20th - 22nd we drove to Ortahisar Belediyesi... Ummm.. Well it's still somewhere safe in Turkey :)) Anyways... We stayed in a unique cave house, also courtesy of AirBnB. Most importantly it's a cave house with high speed internet :p The house belongs to a man named Hayrettin. A Fairy Chimney House he called it. Meeting Hayrettin was another experience. It turns out that many Turkish people don't talk english (very much). Including Hayrettin. But we still were able to communicate and Hayrettin is a very friendly host. Now... The reason why we stayed here in the first place was because the chimney house is quite close to Cappadocia. Yes. THAT Cappadocia. The one with hot air balloons rides. Oh I wanted that hot air balloon ride so bad... Just as bad as Cersei wanted those elephants*... Long before we left Jakarta, I specifically asked my doc whether it was okay for me to hop on a balloon ride :p But I guess we have to come back again someday. Because the weather was impossible. Why?

BECAUSE IT WAS SNOWING!!! :))) Imagine how shocked we all were! Good for me and Kukka, our jackets are thick and warm and we brought long trousers. But Hubster? Most of his clothes were t-shirts and shorts :)) I think it was snowing all night long because when we woke up, snow was everywhere. The temperature was -5Celcius. While Hubs and Precious Godsend were having a snowball fight, I sat very close to the heater with the rest of the family members. With clattering teeth, I kept sipping on my hot cup of coffee, hot chocolate and hot tea! Anything that was hot!!! :)) I couldn't even stay long outside the house to take pictures or videos of my babies having snowball fight or taking pictures of anything for that matter! I was shivering!!! It was not what I've expected it would be. But of course, it was super fun.

On April 22nd - 24th we continued our roadtrip and moved in to Mr. Volkan's house in Sapanca, a 5-hours drive city from Ankara. This was our last stop before we finally flew back home. Staying at Volkan's house was another experience. To me it felt more like spending the nights at a friend's house rather than a B&B place. Why? Because when there's no guests, Volkan does stay there. So the feeling was different than any AirBnB houses we've stayed before which probably are actually being left empty when there are no guests. Volkan's house looks like a typical traditional european house, complete with a classic looking chimney. It has a very large garden with lush green grass and there are 2 big dogs, 1 on a leash and 1 in a cage. They're very friendly. As far as I can remember the dogs never bark at us even once! And they were very happy whenever Kukka came to them and petted their heads. The doggies' tails would wag here and there and their faces looked excited. Too bad I couldn't remember their names... 

Anyways we spent the last day shopping at Anatolia Bazaar to buy some sweets. To be honest this place was not on my list. I didn't know Anatolia Bazaar is apparently a must-visit place when you're in Turkey. Being in there made me dizzy. People were practically screaming and moving fast here and there. The guys kept asking you which snacks you wanted, where you come from and stuff. Not my kind of place although I did buy a box of rocks-looking chocolate. But our little family has never been the kind who buy souvenirs (Kukka said: "Olé-olé) for others, like friends and family members. Not even for my Mom and Dad. Unlike Ibu and Mba Dewi who did buy lots of stuff for themselves and others :)) I guess Hubster, Kukka and I prefer to... eat and hang out rather than shopping? :p

On April 25th at 15:37 we finally landed in Jakarta and then arrived at home safe and sound. Alhamdulillah. Kukka practically squeezed Moochi in her arms because she missed him very much. I miss my bed and my maid's sambel terasi!!! :)) I've planned to blog about this trip as soon as we got home but sadly it was impossible. Why? My eyes didn't want to cooperate! :)) All I wanted was sleep, sleep, sleep. And now as I'm writing this, I do realize that I must have forgotten and missed a lot of stuff. Sadly I could only rely on some of the things written on my notebook and some tweets. What I can say about this family trip is that I had fun. I've spent a lovely time with my inlaws. I got to know Mba Dewi, my sister in law, better. I've been given a chance to experience another phase in my life together with my preteen baby. I've seen beautiful buildings like Anitkabir and Ayasofya Müzesi. All in all, this Turkey holiday was a hit and I'm very grateful for it!

*Game of Thrones fans only

KESTINGRUM: Casting Dari Rumah

My husband, or as some of my loyal readers might now him as SiBapa, is a...complicated man. You can't really describe him with just one word or two. For example SiBapa can be very lazy. So lazy that he often does nothing but playing DOTA all day long and finishes his job at the very last minute. But when he's being productive, SiBapa just won't stop doing the things he does until it's done. And it has to be good. Everything has to meet his standards which are often quite unusual. If things don't go according his way, SiBapa can be a really pain in the butt to work with. That's why I never want to work with or for him :p But SiBapa, from what I've heard, is also a very cool person to work with. He enjoys teaching to those who are eager to learn. He's very smart, very funny and he will tell you things as it is. If your idea sucks, SiBapa will tell you in your face. Then he lets you think by yourself to make your ideas better after giving you some hints. Many times he'll help you by offering some solutions or at the end even his ideas. And so far, SiBapa's ideas from what I've heard are... Not disappointing :p

SiBapa enjoys his work as a commercial director but he's never satisfied. He always wants more. Not long ago practically out of the blue SiBapa wanted to make t-shirts. What did he do to make it happen? He bought a Screen Printing Rotary Press. It's a machine which you can print stuff on t-shirts. Does he sell any t-shirts? Not that I know of. But Kukka did! There was this school project which she had to earn some money. What did Kukka do? Made t-shirts using SiBapa's machine :)) Alhamdulillah lots of friends and families bought Kukka's t-shirts and the money was donated to her school for the expedition to Gunung Padang. Not bad 'eh? :)

Anyways... SiBapa has been directing television commercials for 9 years now. You might know his TVCs such as Ramayana, Tokopedia, Aqua, etc. For many years of experiences SiBapa often work with the same team, same people, including the talents/models who act in his commercials. Sometimes it's a must but many times he also has to use the same talents because of the lack of choices. But SiBapa believes that somewhere out there, there must be lots of people who actually can act. It's just a matter of finding the people and giving them the opportunities. Then one day SiBapa had an idea of making an application called Kestingrum. What is Kestingrum? Now before I tell you about it, please don't consider this blogpost as a promotional act :)) I don't do that. Not even for my beloved husband. I write about Kestingrum because objectively speaking, I think this is a brilliant idea. How do I know that it is brilliant? Well... I did work in advertising for many years. I still remember how we use the same talents over the years again and again and again. And it still pisses me off! You can even see it on tv, right??? Oh this is the guy from commercial A! Oh look! There he is again on commercial B! And on and on and on. BOOOOORING!!!! And so after lots of hours of hard work, here is SiBapa's latest thing:

Kestingrum is a free application which you can download from Apple App Store or Google Play on your smartphone. It's an app which will let you know if there's any vacancy as a model for a tv commercial. If there is a cast wanted, Kestingrum will let you know everything that you have to do and you can post your action on the app. If you're selected, congratulations! If not... Well... At least you don't have to spend hours in traffic or standing in lines in some office which is far away from home. Then when it's finally your turn, it only lasts for one minute or maybe even less. Yup! Casting can be mentally and emotionally exhausting. It also costs a lot of money. Then the worst thing happen: after probably days of waiting in vain, you find out that you're not selected!! :( But now all you have to do is download the app Kestingrum, look for the jobs you want, follow the instructions, find a nice spot at home to act, upload your video and wait for the announcement. You can also find Kestingrum on Facebook, Youtube and follow its instagram account: @kestingrum.

SiBapa is very passionate and proud of Kestingrum. I must say it's been quite a long while since the last time I see him so eager doing a project like this. There were days (and still) when all he talks about is Kestingrum and as his wife, I totally support him. There are days when I see him very exhausted. But then I hear him making jokes and laugh outloud with his team while working on Kestingrum. So I assume everything is going great. It's March 2019 and SiBapa has already done so many things. Who knows what he has in his mind for years to come. I, the wife, will just let him surprise me. Like always ;)

Oh! As a bonus, here is SiBapa talking about talents: 

Enjoy! :p

Doc. Rocksy Menjelaskan:

"..... Wah banyak sekali (kejangnya)! Masih 6 minggu yang lalu kita ketemu... Gula darahnya bagus. Tekanan darah normal. Saya kasih Riklona 1/2 selama 30 hari ya untuk bantu tidur.. #etc

............................................................. 

...... Saya pengen ibu ketemu sama pasien saya yang depresi, ngga mau ketemu siapa-siapa, ngga mau makan, ngga bisa tidur, benar-benar depresi. ......... #etc"

Shit. I accidentaly stopped the recording because I wanted to show her the videos while I was having the seizures. The recording stopped just like that. God damn it. I really have to remember that this might happen. Or even better, iPhone SHOULD START MAKING IT HAPPEN! But I told her my... Theories? About why these seizures happened at these times.

Other than that, today's session didn't take very long. No EEG or any other tests than checking up my blood sugar level. I told dr. Rocksy about Eza wanted to take Daddy to see her. She said anytime. Daddy will be prioritize because that's what the hospital does for elderly - emergency patients. So it means that Daddy doesn't have to wait too long for her. I also got the authorized letter to bring medicines to another country. dr. Rocky told me to have fun. She always does. And this time I really want to bring something back for her. Something pretty :)

Another nice thing I encountered today was when the nurse asked my birth of date and stuff, she said that I looked too young to be 43. I thought you're in your early or tops mid 30s, seriously, not kidding. That's what the nurse told me. I laughed hard, showed her my grey strands and said thank you. On my way home I successfully took a nap in the car. After lunch I spent about 2.5 hours nap in the bedroom.

So in overall, today has been going well. Alhamdulillah.

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