Bebi To Baduy And Back

Last night as I laid myself to sleep, I had the chance to look closely at my Sleeping Beauty's face, who was snoring softly next to me. I stroked her thick wavy hair gently and caressed her plump rosy cheeks. Then I kissed her hand and whispered to myself "How did I get so lucky?" 🥰🥰🥰

My Precious Godsend is 15 In shāʾ Allāh going on 16 years old. Yet here and then she still loves to be treated as 😘BUBU'S BEBI😘 Don't get me wrong though! When her TEENAGER MODE is on??? Bebi's all like "I need my space. I can do it by myself. Please leave me alone, Bubu." 😔😅 But fortunately most of bedtimes my Bebi still wants to have her Bubu laying next to her. I guess it's because this is when the mother-daughter talk occurs. Precious time which involves lots of stories, laughters, full of secrets. Simply... Irreplaceable. 

Last week Bubu's Bebi had a 2 days 1 night adventure in Baduy with her school. Her first overnight trip with HelloMotion Highschool. Only 1 night. Yet it was quite a torture for me. I couldn't sleep. I heard voices upstairs. Did I see something? I can't remember... Maybe. I think I've been having hallucinations more often than last year. I had a 2:30 minutes morning seizure and a couple more until the rest of the day. Yuli had to remind me to eat and to take naps. Si Jun offered me a drive around the block. Even Moochi stayed close to me the whole time 😽 I kept asking Yuli "Kok belum ada kabar ya, Yul?" Yuli laughed and said "Yaaaaa si Ibu! Eneng baru juga berangkat!" She also reminded me that this wasn't the first time Kukka went to Baduy. "Waktu di Sekolah Alam kan pernah pergi juga bu! Tidurnya malah di tenda!" I seriously couldn't remember. Lucky me I always posted pictures 😄 And yes there she was... On my Instagram and Facebook. Carrying that huge purple backpack, sleeping in an orange tent, laughing excitedly on a boat while floating along a dirty river and more 😂 And she looked very happy. So I said to myself "Just chill Farika!!! Your daughter is having a great time with her friends now. She's safe and will be back tomorrow. TOMORROW!!!" 😆

My day got a little bit better when pictures of my Bebi and her friends started to fill the parents' Whatsapp group. I got all hyped up and was like "Ada anakkuuuuuu!" 😂 I also felt much better when the other parents confessed that they felt the same way like I did 😂 One parent at a time opened up after I apologized being so lebay and I said "Harap maklum ini anak satu-satunya 😅" One replied something like "Dimaklumi kok Bubu! Anak saya ada 3 perasaannya sama aja." Alhamdulillah 😄 

And then the night came... Around 8:30pm Moochi began to act strange. He also looked sad and confused. He didn't want to finish his meal. He went up and down, meowing in front of the office door, my bedroom door, places where Kukka usually spend her time in. Then Moochi went in and out of My Precious Godsend's bedroom 😢 Finally he jumped on Kukka's bed and... 

😢😘

I sorta confessed to Moochi that it was a tough night for me too... I woke up probably 4 times around, 10pm, midnight, 2am, then 3am. I had a "real" sleep after I took my morning pills and Yuli already came to work. Then at around 11am my baby girl texted me 🥳 She sent me pictures with her teacher, Bu Salma and 1 with Kiko, her friend. I was beyond happy! And über rempong 🤪 I told Jun that we should leave early so we would be there when Kukka's train arrive at Stasiun Jurangmangu. Alhamdulillah we were there on time. Around 4:45pm my love was back in my arms 🥰 Sweaty and smelly 😄 But... She looked fresh and had a lot of stories to tell. 

When we arrived at home I ORDERED my Precious Godsend to take a very long hot shower 🤣 Hair shampoo-rinse and repeat I said. 3 times! 🧐 When she's finally finished we laid down on my bed, hugging and sharing stories. It didn't take long until I heard nothing than a soft snore. My baby slept for hours! I could only imagine how tired she must have been... I hugged my baby carefully and whispered "I'm so happy you're back, Bebi... And I'm so grateful that I can be with you right here, right now. Sweet dreams my pretty angel..." Then I took a nap with the most beautiful person in my life laying next to me. Alhamdulillah.

       

"I don't want to be away from my kids, not that much. I don't want to miss their lives to go do a thing that I'm grateful to be able to do, and I'm appreciative that you're here to see it, but I've done it a lot, you know? I'm kind of want to feel okay and I want to make sure my family's okay, and that's great. That's okay." 

*Trent Reznor*