Wednesday, May 29, 2019

Eid Is Coming

It's the time when families and friends get together to ask and give each other forgiveness. It's the time when families and friends enjoying delicious food and naturally each other's company. It's the time when families and friends share funny stories and making new beautiful memories. It's the time to be grateful and happy. Together.

So be nice and stop saying or asking dumb and useless things such as:

1. Kapan nikah? (When are you gonna get married?/Still single?)
2. Jangan terlalu gemuk. (Wow you're fat!)
3. Kok kurus?!? (Why are you so skinny!?)
4. Kemana aja nih? (Where have you been?)
5. Belum isi nih? Keburu tua lho! (You're not pregnant yet? You'll be too old!)
6. Ngga mau nambah lagi? (Don't you want another child?)

And this list can go on and on and on until the end of the world. Feel free to post it on the comment section if you come up with another one. And these are ONLY the things that come out of the mouth. Imagine what's inside the heart??? 

"Wow he's ugly now... Good thing I didn't marry him." 
"Is she getting lips botox injection and facelift?"
"How can he afford that expensive car?"
"That Rolex watch... Is it real?"
"So she got divorced.. She must be cheating on her husband."
"Is he wearing the same baju koko from yesterday's iftar?"
"No hijab? She's definitely not praying hard enough. That's why no enlightenment for her."


Now my question is: WHY??????????????? If you can't or don't know what to say to the person in front of you, just smile, be nice and MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS!!! Don't make small talks which can lead to anger or even worse, heartbreak and silent tears.

She might still be single because it's her choice and she's happy with it. He might be fat because of some illness he suffering and he's been working his butt off to lose it. She is skinny maybe because it's just the way she is. He might not come to 1001 bukbers (buka bersama) because he's been busy making a living until midnights. She might not be pregnant because she can't and she's trying very hard to accept it. She might not want to have another child because she and her husband only want one or cannot afford it. He might stay inside the house all the time because he's trying to be his own boss and making a home business. The point is you don't know what other people is dealing with and again, it's none of your business.

Lately I consider some gatherings like bukber or in this case Eid as events where people sadly judge each other's condition badly, openly or not, blood-related or not. I'm not a saint. That's obvious. I've made a lot of mistakes. Since I don't live in the jungle and obviously need other people, all I can do now is choosing the kind of gathering which I consider as meaningful and...harmless :)) Like enjoying a cup of coffee or two with friends who we can pour each other's heart out with. Or accepting a friend's invitation just to maintain a good relationship. One thing is definite: if you do want to spend Eid, enjoy the blissful day with the ones you love. So stay healthy, enjoy the rest of this fasting month and remember to finish all the must-dos. 

Because yeah... 

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